The Pohosiwa Lines

These paintings are found in Spain’s El Castillo cave. They are near 41,000 years old and might have been created by Neanderthals. The possible Neanderthal connection, and their purpose, are still subjects of heated debate in archeological circles.


These are the mysterious Nazca lines of Peru. They date from about 500 A.D. and are discernable only from the air.  Their purpose has never been positively determined.


These are the Pohosiwa lines (Port Hope sidewalk). They’re approximately 3 days old but their origins are unclear.


There was a town truck parked in front of my neighbour’s house most of that afternoon. Though the only town employee I saw was rolling some kind of hand-held wheeled device I couldn’t see clearly.  We never actually witnessed the artist creating the lines nor understand their purpose. You’ll note the one has a distinctly geometric quadrangle design, while the other faintly resembles a canine head in profile. I noticed the artist left an unpainted part of the canine head profile at the asphalt the town filled in the sidewalk with, last Summer. Perhaps some religious taboo against painting over asphalt or maybe the canine’s ears were considered sacred and so, couldn’t be drawn ? The artist even removed pieces of the substrate to complete his work.  Note this lawn-mower buster found on the surrounding terrain.


The fact that I’ve never seen Pohosiwa lines on asphalt anywhere else in town lends credibility to the theory. However, I do know that painting tree roots is permitted by the Works Dept. Shamans. The wife and I saw another occurrence on the trail behind the soccer fields across from the Fairgrounds, last Fall. Every root that broke the surface of the earth had been painted that same mysterious, yet captivating orange.

What does it mean? Where’s the reason? Why are these things done? I took up counsel with my neighbour. After discussing how Chrysler was the best thing that ever happened to Life on Earth, and that the weather is all due to the bombing “over there” in I-rack (I misspelled Iraq intentionally ’cause that’s how he pronounced it), I walked away none the wiser (and none surprised by that either).

I discussed it with Ranger, and I discussed it with the wife.  The only conclusion we could draw was the Pohosiwa lines might be the town’s pathetically stupid attempt to protect the octogenarian population from performing “face plants” while navigating the sidewalks about town.  A somewhat more cynical view might be that they’re the town’s pathetically stupid attempt to protect themselves from lawsuits should a member of the octogenarian population perform the afore-mentioned “face plant”, (or “lip stand” dependent upon your cultural orientation, or the orientation of their chins upon impact I suppose).

There might be an advantageous effect on tourism as curiosity seekers may be drawn to the mysterious lines, and their equally mysterious origins and purpose.  There are even those who suggest, this might well be the purpose of the Pohosiwa Lines.  I can’t help but think that, maybe, just maybe, the wheeled device that town employee pushed up and down the street, could have had a spray paint bomb on it.  That might explain things better than alien spaceship landing coordinates, ancient Gods, or spirit worlds.

But then, I’m not one to promote conspiracy theories.




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